2007 biscuits is finally here for me and my east coast crew (cause we are hardcore). So much has trance-spired in the last 7 months since Hammerstein brahs that i can't even get into it all right now but let me just say that Sunshine is off tour right now cause she gave birth to Robbie the bears' twin babies. Their names are Shelby and Lai Wexelbaum and yes, they were circumsized. they were born on April 19th and man was Sunshine pissed she couldn't partake in the annual Garden State Ganja Blowout on 4-20. My boy Jimbo throws a serious kegger at his momz house and we all raged to our favorite local trancejam act "The Collective Groove Orchestra Earth Project". Brahs- word to the wise - check these dudes out! so not generic! anyways to the review brahmigos...
Well the rain was heavy but the patdown was soft and getting into Lupos was like getting into Sunshine, a bear could do it. Thats a good thing too cause i went to the show with my boy Jimbo who swings the fuel out of his momz basement so i thought all would be chill. The effen noob just stashed the blow in his front pockets and security finds it like no problem and he is sent packing (rumor has it he cried to the cops). So now i am solo at this show and i am sober. Thats right brahs, never thought i would see the day i would be dead sober at the start of a biscuit show but there i was. I mean i puffed a few bowls in the car in the lot and did a couple lines and blew an adderall and ate half an oxy but I was totally sober so I effen hit the bar and sat there...the Biscuits came on and I still sat there, in fact, i sat by the bar facing the stage the entire first set. I drank about 8 Coors lights and watched probably like the worst first set EVAH!! i mean it was like Jam > Liquid Handcuffs > Reactor > Svenghali > Cyclone > Reactor or something and then like some new instrumental tune or something. The heat was not brought, there was like not even like a second i was feeling it. The set was mad short and when it was over i hit the bathroom to take a piss.
So after pissing, running into my boy who had some Molly, then hitting the stalls, then pissing again, then running into my girl with zanibars then hitting the stalls, then running into Spun Rob with some L and then hitting the stalls again and then seeing some random dude boofing pressies and buying a few and hitting the stalls and then boofing and then running into Crystal with the yip and then ripping gaggerinos on the toliet paper dispenser and then hitting the stalls cause of the yak-shits and then pooping the pressies i just boofed and then picking the pressies out of my own poop and the re-boofing, i was ready to go up front and rage 2nd set. I hit the floor and as soon as I got in the center of the floor the lights went low and it was time for the heat. I lit up a butt and the boys kicked it off with a SHICK Floodlights fake out > TRUIMPH! SHO SHICK! i was laying down the most righteous trancedance that could summon the gods and show them that i am not scared of their all powerful ways for I could cast divine intervention with a level 3 shout and manner and breakdance-fight my way to victory but the floor was so crowded i was getting tossed around by the youngest bunch of custy raver high schoolers this side of Scranton. I was lighting it up hard and then they bust into INVERTED LADIES! this whole sequence was the fiyah! the crowd was hanging on to barbers every note like he offered his nutsac to be licked. Thats when i realized i had to pee and i was trapped in the middle of this shuper packed epic dancefloor. Then it hit me, yes the 'cid ANNNND the idea of the century! it took me a second but once i closed my eyes i could just do it. I wet myself. I peed all over my pants and more some. Once the whiff of my man-urine got loose I had so much dancing room it was awesome! I was bouncing all around feeling the music and not giving a fuck. The biscuits bust into Hot Air Balloon which was really tioght and then i got my Onamae Wa which was real awesome and like jammed out and stuff. Then we got a Memphis to end the set which sounded alittle reworked to be honest but that coulda just been the L or the molly...the boys leave the stage and maybe the smell of my piss or the weather outside prompted this but we got a WET encore! EPIC! Barber shredded so hard on this tune it was crazy. I was kickin up puddles and splashing around to this gem! Then to end the night we got a techno treat of Safety Dance. Say what you will haters but this is Barbers best tune since Kitchen Mitts. FLAME AWAY NANCIES!
So after the epicness that was set two and the encore I go outside and cool off. I meet up with Jimbo who is in tears. Broseph was only trying to get into his 3rd show so i felt bad for him. I got a call on my cell from Sunshine and told her the setlist and how i wet my pants to get more dancing room and shit. I love to make her laugh. She says having the bears gave her life purpose, I think it gave me purpose too. Robbie the bear is making the hike out to Camp this year for sure so he can meet his kids but him and Sunshine aren't an item i guess cause hes an effen bear and shit. The afterparty back at the hotey was mild cause I ate 5 valium and passed out for 22 hours straight. we missed checkout and had to pay like $40 more bucks. sucked. Well biscuiteers thats what went down in Providence on the realz. Shit was a solid tour opener and 2007 biscuits are ready to rock...see you all next time as i tackle The Calvin again this Saturday!
-abovethedave
05/16/07 Lupos Heartbreak Hotel, Providence, RI
Set I: Lunar Pursuit1> Svenghali2> Cyclone> Reactor3, Songs of Joy
Set II: 10 Ton Foot1, Triumph> And The Ladies Were The Rest Of The Night4> Hot Air Balloon, Onamae Wa, Pilin' It High> We're Not Gonna Take It5
Encore: Wet, The Safety Dance
1 1st timed played
2 Dyslexic
3 End Only
4 Inverted
5 The Who cover. Ending Only (Listening to you...)
Commentary: Some kid was crying outside of this show supposedly, for real.
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